Today is her feast day. For fourteen hundred years the Church called the apostle to the apostles a repentant whore, because a woman carrying that much power and worth had to be cut down to fit. To be
Her story is the story of all women under patriarchy, all of us made to get back into our boxes until most of us forgot that the boxes were even there. I feel the diminishment, the shame, the fear that rises up in me when I try to expand to a fuller shape, a more true expression of my essence. ‘Don’t get too big for your boots,’ I hear my dead mother say. ‘Your head will get so big you won’t fit through the door,' she adds. Oh Mum, the box was always too small for you too.
I feel this to my core in a way words can’t fully capture. With deep gratitude and love I thank you for sharing this honest, humble and powerful testimony that calls on our sovereignty to come forth. I am here. ♥️🌹
I too as a woman in her sixth decade of life am experiencing a healing most profound I discovered a fear planted deep where my place at the circle was not certain A most precarious place to be because you’re never quite sure what action will cause acceptance or rejection. Fortunately, deeper than that I’ve come into contact with a deeper knowing and this is Mary’s domain. My seat at the circle is assured Can I surrender my smallness and make room for sovereignty ?
As a male devotee of MM, today I honor her and all of the women that she is raising up. Your message is beautiful and courageous, and I appreciate the amazing artwork you included by a real human and not AI. May you be blessed with everything you desire.
Ahhhh what a wonderful post to read first thing this morning. No wonder she has spoken to me all these years. From the time I was 16 to now at 68, she has been with me all this time. Beautiful.
Thank you for these honest and powerful words. It is so affirming to read this and be encouraged to go beyond my self held limitations to stand and be seen in my own light, to recognize what I want and receive it, to share from fullness and embodied love.
When they feel too small, and they believe it’s impossible for them to match our height, they tend to pull us down simply so they can feel taller. It is what has been handed down to them as well, unfortunately.
And since they feel already small, and already fed the big lie: ‘don’t let her know she is or grow bigger,’ then they tend to carry it through their lifetime in fear.
Also, since they have tasted the wine of power, even though they didn’t really command it (deserve it), it gets even harder to recognize how they have been bought into smallness with lies.
So they keep staying where they assume they belong, always so low that they have to keep pulling us down further along below them so that they can keep holding onto that power without actually rising up above us—which would be work—since they have been led into laziness all along and don’t know any better.
I'm so glad I found you through Jodi Day's restack. Well met. As a 68-year-old writer who spent her life teaching high school English, while getting degrees in Mythology and Psychology on the side, I felt every word. I spent 25+ years writing books and essays without publishing much. And it's still with me. I went on a total darkness retreat this past April and had no trouble being inside the mother-womb. In fact, it was like hibernation where dream and reality combined into a seamless whole. I saw myself, who I really was, and what I could really do. Bliss. Some people have terrible trouble meeting themselves in the darkness - for me, the trouble started after I returned home and met all the blocks and reasons why I'm STILL not that person. I sobbed as if someone had died for three days. I cried so hard, my husband bought me flowers. I feel it pinching my tear ducts even now as I tell the truth about it. I still have posts that leave me face down on the bed after I click publish, and I'm often afraid to say the truth when I don't agree with a powerful writer with a big following. But I persist. My practice is to be willing to feel yuck my stepping up kicks up. Though I dislike Christianity unless it is the devotional kind, I love Mary. I look forward to diving into your posts.
I adore your writing, I feel quenched by your wisdom. I hear the passion and sincerity in your voice. I see it in your eyes. It feels like exactly the empowering invitation you speak of, and precisely because you are not dimming your light. Neither does it feel presumptuous. It speaks for itself. I’m grateful for your leadership. ♥️
Her story is the story of all women under patriarchy, all of us made to get back into our boxes until most of us forgot that the boxes were even there. I feel the diminishment, the shame, the fear that rises up in me when I try to expand to a fuller shape, a more true expression of my essence. ‘Don’t get too big for your boots,’ I hear my dead mother say. ‘Your head will get so big you won’t fit through the door,' she adds. Oh Mum, the box was always too small for you too.
I feel this to my core in a way words can’t fully capture. With deep gratitude and love I thank you for sharing this honest, humble and powerful testimony that calls on our sovereignty to come forth. I am here. ♥️🌹
You know that you are a gifted writer when reader constantly says yes! yes! yes! while reading. Thank you!🙏
What an extraordinary article to wake up into. Thank you for sharing and shining. I am letting this rearrange me.
Adding my voice to the choir… thank you.
I too as a woman in her sixth decade of life am experiencing a healing most profound I discovered a fear planted deep where my place at the circle was not certain A most precarious place to be because you’re never quite sure what action will cause acceptance or rejection. Fortunately, deeper than that I’ve come into contact with a deeper knowing and this is Mary’s domain. My seat at the circle is assured Can I surrender my smallness and make room for sovereignty ?
What a beautiful post. Thank you for reminding us all
Lovely and powerful, both. Like the Magdalene herself, and like we, ourselves, if and when we dare to be. Thank you Elayne.
As a male devotee of MM, today I honor her and all of the women that she is raising up. Your message is beautiful and courageous, and I appreciate the amazing artwork you included by a real human and not AI. May you be blessed with everything you desire.
Ahhhh what a wonderful post to read first thing this morning. No wonder she has spoken to me all these years. From the time I was 16 to now at 68, she has been with me all this time. Beautiful.
Beautifully written and so relevant today for all women connecting to their truth.
Thank you for these honest and powerful words. It is so affirming to read this and be encouraged to go beyond my self held limitations to stand and be seen in my own light, to recognize what I want and receive it, to share from fullness and embodied love.
As an estranged Mother of a blended family of 11, who left the patriarchy movement, this gives me such hope.
Full power includes full love and full joy.
Seeing full power and full joy rampant encourages others to also be in full lives.
When they feel too small, and they believe it’s impossible for them to match our height, they tend to pull us down simply so they can feel taller. It is what has been handed down to them as well, unfortunately.
And since they feel already small, and already fed the big lie: ‘don’t let her know she is or grow bigger,’ then they tend to carry it through their lifetime in fear.
Also, since they have tasted the wine of power, even though they didn’t really command it (deserve it), it gets even harder to recognize how they have been bought into smallness with lies.
So they keep staying where they assume they belong, always so low that they have to keep pulling us down further along below them so that they can keep holding onto that power without actually rising up above us—which would be work—since they have been led into laziness all along and don’t know any better.
I'm so glad I found you through Jodi Day's restack. Well met. As a 68-year-old writer who spent her life teaching high school English, while getting degrees in Mythology and Psychology on the side, I felt every word. I spent 25+ years writing books and essays without publishing much. And it's still with me. I went on a total darkness retreat this past April and had no trouble being inside the mother-womb. In fact, it was like hibernation where dream and reality combined into a seamless whole. I saw myself, who I really was, and what I could really do. Bliss. Some people have terrible trouble meeting themselves in the darkness - for me, the trouble started after I returned home and met all the blocks and reasons why I'm STILL not that person. I sobbed as if someone had died for three days. I cried so hard, my husband bought me flowers. I feel it pinching my tear ducts even now as I tell the truth about it. I still have posts that leave me face down on the bed after I click publish, and I'm often afraid to say the truth when I don't agree with a powerful writer with a big following. But I persist. My practice is to be willing to feel yuck my stepping up kicks up. Though I dislike Christianity unless it is the devotional kind, I love Mary. I look forward to diving into your posts.
I adore your writing, I feel quenched by your wisdom. I hear the passion and sincerity in your voice. I see it in your eyes. It feels like exactly the empowering invitation you speak of, and precisely because you are not dimming your light. Neither does it feel presumptuous. It speaks for itself. I’m grateful for your leadership. ♥️